mind my story: why I’m doing this

My mind is my story, but am I brave enough to tell it?

Nearly two years ago I was reading 'Notes on the Nervous Planet' by Matt Haig and it struck me. We need more stories. More stories that normalise our mental health for what it is; with all its colours, our happy and sad moments; hustles, successes and devastations along the way. We need to normalise the conversation around what anxiety or depression feels like. Why it's ok to say (out loud) that you're not ok. So that finally saying 'I have a bad mental health day today' is as easily accepted (and said) as saying 'I have a cold'. 

The idea behind Mind My Story series is therefore twofold. 

Firstly, it's about making stories accessible. At the peak (and very begining) of my anxiety, back in 2017, I didn't know who I could talk to. A lot of the times, especially when I was feeling very very very stressed (tears in my eyes stressed), I seemed to have been operating on 'I'm doing great' response to not only strangers and colleagues at work, but even my closest friends and family. 

I broke down eventually and started putting myself back together, but I learnt how to be open about my mental health along the way. I remember I nearly cried in a Partner's office at my firm, when he stopped what we were working on and asked me 'But really, are you ok?'. I wasn't. But being asked about it, and being able to talk about it openly felt instantly better. 

I eventually learnt to ask everyone how they are doing three times. Because it takes that many times for someone to open up and say they are not well. And I also found that dropping in an odd and subtle comment about how I struggle with anxiety before I ask them for the third time helps too. It's natural right? We don't want to come across vulnerable, unless we feel psychologically safe and know that the person we're opening up to won't judge us. 

So Mind My Story is party about creating that psychological safety. I hope to find  people who feel strong enough to make the first more and share their stories, to encourage those who are reading them that it's OK to not be OK sometimes. As simple as that. 

Secondly, it's about making stories relatable. I think we all have somewhat an influencer fatigue. As much as I love reading success stories, advice and what not from famous people and large Instagram influencers, I always question - is it real? Or were they paid to say this?  And if this is their genuine experience, how much of it is the same in their lives as it is in mine? Do they sit at a desk 9-5(+), do they feel the same amount of stress and imposter syndrome around their annual performance reviews? You get the idea - it's not always that easy to relate to someone who is not like you. 

And don't get me wrong. We're all human and I know that. My purpose is not to validate how similar or dissimilar mine or anyone else’s  life is to what is being shown on high profile social media accounts. My purpose is to tell stories of those who are like us. I call them 'the everyday stories'. I'm interested in people who seek to change the world in their own little way and who do so without being in the spotlight. People who have a mission & footprint bigger than their name.  I'm after hidden creatives, small entrepreneurs, mental health survivors and advocates who feel passionately about one subject or another and are not afraid to share it. 

Mind My Story will hopefully become a series of short, inspiring and open conversations. If you can take one thing from each story and allow yourself to be a little bit more open to yourself and those around you going forward, I will feel that I'm edging one millimetre closer to my goal. 

So my ask to you - keep the conversation open. Read, share, comment. Online, but more importantly - offline & with people around you. And I will patiently wait for your feedback.