finding the inner strength to fight anger with Louis
Photo courtesy of Louis Regenspurger
Mind My Story with Abstract Artist Louis Regenspurger
I had a gut feeling I wanted to interview Louis before I knew what her story was truly about. Louis had briefly mentioned to me she started painting again after she got cancer. Having seen the illness in my own family, I instantly knew the amount of resilience and strength it must take to come out, create and share it with the world, as Louis does.
Her purpose as an artist - “to encourage people to deal with their inner strength and become aware of it.” As with everyone who experienced a great deal of uncertainty that terminal illnesses comes with, Louis brings her most raw and honest experiences to this conversation.
I’ve found she has a unique sense of calm about her. Patience that defies time and lets her choose her words, and therefore her narrative, carefully.
Louis’ story is nowhere near finished. As a cancer survivor, as a new artist, she’s only starting to write it out again. But this brief conversation reminded me of one thing. Our strength is not defined by what we do, when everything is going according to the plan. It is shown to us based on how we react, what we remember and how we carry ourselves forwards when we take unexpected turns in life. Into the unknown.
Laura: Tell me a little bit about yourself, your story & your art.
Louis: I am 33 years old and live with my partner, 2 cats, 3 rabbits and quail in a small town in the middle of Germany. I love to be outside and to travel with our little camper bus.
When I got cancer in 2018, everything changed. I got the diagnosis in New Zealand during my work and travel year there. My world collapsed… Of course everything changed! The word life suddenly took on a new meaning. Thanks to chemotherapy and radiation, I have been without cancer since last year.
That time was the hardest and worst I've ever experienced. I was very angry for a long time. I just couldn't see the point. My head didn't understand what my heart felt. And the other way around.
As a child, I started painting out of curiosity. Today I paint to process what I have experienced.
Photo courtesy of Louis Regenspurger
Laura: It must have been very hard to process what was happening when you got your diagnosis. I’ve got someone in my close family going through this right now. What would be your best advice on how to cope with anxiety and anger that stems from a long-term illness?
Louis: Don't try to push away your fear and anger. I would always recommend going through these with professional help. Family and friends give a lot of support, love and strength. But of course they cannot give you an objective view of certain things and emotions.
And accept that there are simply days when you don't want to fight anymore. This is okay! Please don't feel guilty or weak. The cool thing is dear people will always be there to remind you why and what you are fighting for.
Laura: That was important to hear for me, thank you for your honesty. Talking about your art, at what point and how did you rediscover art as a way to express yourself?
Louis: When all treatments were completed last year, I was able to relax a little bit. And to fill my free time I brought out my drawing pad again. I had so much fun. I bought new canvases, acrylic paint and brushes.
I drew a painting for my best friend's birthday. While creating her painting I had so many positive emotions. It was amazing and very uplifting for my insecure self!
My best friend and my partner encouraged me to continue and also - to show my art to other people. That took a long time before I was confident enough to do it. I gradually discovered how healing painting was and is for me!
Photo courtesy of Louis Regenspurger
Laura: What does creativity & the art you’re making mean to you?
Louis: For me, creativity means freedom, independence and being able to let go of things. I am very grateful to be able to express my creativity. This is not always easy. A lot of emotions are set free through creativity and painting. I couldn't handle it for a long time… I wasn't ready for it or it just was not time to let go.
Making art is not just a healing process for me. With my art I want to remind people how strong their true self really is!
Photo courtesy of Louis Regenspurger
Laura: Your art is full of bright colours, joy and love. Do you always feel that when you’re painting/creating or do you have days when it’s quite hard to make positive art? I know I definitely do have those!
Louis: Hard question. Actually, it's easy for me to do positive art. And of course there are also days when I can't turn my head off and just do it. When I have days like this I have to distance myself from painting. Otherwise I see the mistakes I make while painting as a disaster, I doubt my abilities and so it goes on and on. But the other way around, painting helps me to see meaning even on bad days.
See... it is a difficult question for me cause there is no clear answer.
// Mind My Story is a series of stories about creatives, entrepreneurs and people just like you and me, sharing their mental health stories and experiences in order to break down the stigma around it. We talk about what it looks and feels like, what it takes to be creative on a daily basis and how to keep the spark going to find your purpose in life.
If you think you have a story to share, I can't wait to hear from you. DM me on instagram @CANVASBYLP or email me at laura@canvasbylp.com.
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